Last night I had a little epiphany while watching TV and looking down at my bump and watching my baby boy moving. I say to my husband, "We only have 8 weeks together, just the two of us!" I motioned for him to come sit closer to me and I started to get scared all the sudden.
What if I'm a bad mother? What if it's not what I imagined?
I guess I never thought that this pregnancy would go as fast as it has. I figured that a year always SEEMS to take forever, so 9 months would be just slightly less than forever to wait to meet our new addition.
Now I'm on to some whole other phase of pregnancy. Now I'm terrified that the house isn't ready, that we won't have enough diapers (or that I will just plain SUCK at cloth diapering!), that I have no idea what I'm doing, that I won't trust anyone else to know what THEY'RE doing (what if they put a blanket in bed with him? what if they don't trust what I think is best? what if what I think is best ISN'T what is best at all?)...
Well shart*. I have to be honest with you, it's a pretty scary feeling.
*I originally wrote a different word, but I think I need to clean up m'language, ya get?
We have 8 weeks left. Then our lives will be different. But I think for the most part we're going to be ok.
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| 32 Weeks - HOLY COW! |
Your feelings are 100% normal. I was so scared before my daughter was born. Mainly I thought I would be a horrible mother. What if I forgot to feed her on time etc.
ReplyDeleteYou worked so hard for this pregnancy, you will be a great mother. Of course you will make mistakes and you will learn. All part of the experience.
Good luck on the cloth diapering! I can't believe how much things have changed since I had my daughter almost sixteen years ago.
You're going to be an amazing mother. I think being scared is normal. My mom says she still doesn't know what she's doing and her baby is 27 years old.
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